to my sister

My baby sister/only sister, Madelyn, had her first day of her junior year of high school today. I did not get to see her before she left this morning but I know that she looked beautiful as she seems to get prettier everyday. I know that she showed up in class this morning and said hello to her friends with her huge white smile and then she probably said something about how messed up the iPads and new ID lanyards are and made everyone laugh. I know that she went through her day and made everyone she passed in the hallways feel her warmth as she walked by.

When we were younger we fought all of the time and, as sad as it sounds, we could hardly sit next to each other on a trip to the mall with out our mom threatening to “turn the car around and take us back home.” Oh, how things have changed.

Hours after our dad got out of back surgery this past June, he decided to miraculously get up for a walk around the neurology wing so Madelyn and I decided that we could use a little rest and steal his bed. We laid there for about an hour; taking selfies, cracking jokes to each other that made our parents shake their heads and forcing our mom to take pictures of us like the one shown above.

My dear little Madelyn, oh how I am going to miss my best friend in three days. Yesterday we were telling each other about our day and weekend plans, each of us sitting around in our bath towels, and she asked me who she was going to tell all of these things to after I left. My response was that she would tell them to me, of course.

The truth is that although I will always be a phone call, smoke signal or Skype message away from my darling baby sister, I know that things will not be the same when she tells me stories that make me laugh so hard I cry. I know that I will not be able to give her a big hug when she needs one or give her a big sister eye-roll when she tries to tell me how she thinks things ought to be (which, in all honesty, sometimes do not seem to be that illogical). I do not know who will miss who more or rather who will need who more (most likely I will) but I do know who I will be most excited to see when I come home for the first time (sorry, mom and dad).

I am so proud of the young woman Madelyn has become. She is independent, has a good head on her shoulders and is not afraid to stick out from the crowd in order to be herself. I am not worried for her as I move out of the house where we spent the majority of our childhood and awkward adolescence, for I am not leaving her behind but showing her that she can stand on her own two feet with out me.

Madelyn, do not let others tell you that you should change in order to fit in or be popular. Be your amazing self and you will have an unforgettable last two years of high school. Always remember dad’s advice: Others will not remember what you did but they will always remember how you made them feel. So here’s to you, ya big junior, my legendary little sister.

With love, Carmen


4 Comments Add yours

  1. Dad says:

    All choked up. I love you two! #Proud Pappa


  2. Marylu says:

    Carmen – your writing is poignant! You are writing from the heart and it is great! People can related in some way to what you write! Best wishes for your bright future!

    Your Mom’s cousin


  3. deb lammers says:

    Carmen, your writing is amazing…you are wise far beyond your years…
    Love you,
    Aunt Deb


  4. Shari says:

    Carmen – I miss you and your honesty at practice! Shari


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